Social Media Marketing

I am 26 years old as a result of which I am one of the lucky few who has seen a world devoid of cell phones, Facebook & computers in the very early years of my life.

I was also one of the lucky few to have experienced independence from these pseudo fundamentals of today.

Now I am not saying these are totally bad and that I despise their existence .But having a completely computer oriented job and have been at my desk for almost 12 hours these past few days (including some huge holidays) I do question its existence and the level of its necessity.

Does it really make life simpler?

Hasn’t the pressure to perform increased with the mere existence of these “TOOLS”?

Efficiency has increased and so have the expectations. The way of working has definitely changed. Work is expected to be completed instantaneously, hence deadlines are closer.

A very small incident that happened a while back made me realise my dependency on them. My friend and I were shopping leisurely along Colaba causeway. When time came to go home we tried to contact her driver on the cell phone, which as it turned out was OFF. Oh MY GOD was our reaction.

We started roaming up and down the causeway searching for the driver asking ourselves one question.

I actually cannot believe I asked myself this: “How did people search cars when there were no cell phones”? This is what my routine machine centric workaholic life had brought me to. Anyways we did find him half an hour later and he had not realised that his cell phone was off.

There is also a small Facebook incident I would like to add here. My little cousin was told by my aunt to wish all his friends for Christmas, since vacations were going on and he wouldn’t be meeting them until new years. “I will post on their wall on Facebook”, came the prompt reply.

It is then that I realised that these things are completely a part of their lives (like TV was for us) and they have no idea how to function without them.

People who are on each others Facebook list may not even acknowledge when they meet each other in person. Facebook has become like the modern diary which stores information of people who may have spoken to each other even once .Now the difference between this and the good old telephone handbook is that this modern magic diary gives updates of everybody in the phonebook.

I am equally hooked onto Facebook, seeing people’s photos and commenting on their status etc and it is a great place for entrepreneurial activities.

But as pointed out by someone, don’t these “THINGS” make us too aware of everything and overly cautious? Aren’t we too scared of taking the smallest possible risks in anything and everything?

Another friend of mine who is going through the “arrange marriage” set up, uses Facebook to find out more information about the alliances found by her parents. But sometimes the information may be a tad bit too much is all I am saying.

Opinions may be formed based on information which maybe totally unnecessary, thus resulting in harsh or incorrect judgements. Having such tools at your disposal I guess it is very difficult not to make use of them and being judgemental is just spontaneous.

Well let me admit here that, I do the research for her most of the time.

Ok now after sharing all my views and giving “GYAAN” about the good old days , I guess this article just stemmed out of the fact that I am overworked  and so its confession time for me .

I cannot live without my cell phone, I feel I need to have Facebook account (I mean how can it not be there, it’s like a phone number), and my computer is one of my most priced possessions.

So, enjoy everything in life but just don’t let it replace human feelings and contact and of course “Never question the good things in life”

Thank you for your time.

See you again soon.

–

“So when something seems worse

Just hang in there

Listen patiently, for this tick will pass

The next swing may be the one

Making life the perfect merry-go -round …”

- Karishma

—

Image Source: ANV Clicks

Few Blog Posts from the past: Back on Our Dear Readers Demand:

Year:2008

Tomorrow onwards I start working in an open office. During renovation, the old traditional layout is being changed from a cabin (large rooms equal to or bigger than a living room) to medium sized cubicles and work stations. It looks impressive since the office is renovated. But it is only partially complete and the full looks with atrium and all other things would get ready in the next few months. So the full impact would be felt when the office is fully renovated. It would be a transformation worthy of notice-perhaps equivalent to an expensive cosmetic corporate surgery.

The first feature that I observe is that the Personal Computer occupies the pride of position, It is kept smack in the middle of the working area and the chair faces it. It seems as though the main function of most employees is staring hard at the computer almost the entire day. It is perhaps equivalent to keeping a note counting machine on every banker’s table as every banker ultimately deals with money. My belief is that computer is one of the tools we use in the course of our work. It could be a vital tool or an accessory (like a belt or a tie) depending on the individual and his position in the hierarchy. But that seems to be the accepted concept today. I am reminded of the cattle shed in some parts of Mumbai (Tabela in local language) where the cattle is tied and faces a trough containing the feed. Unlike human beings they are not let out as there is no space for grazing in Mumbai.

The second striking aspect is the positioning. The consultant informed us that the concept is that there should not be eye contact from one work station to another. This reinforces the concept that though other human beings are close by, they are mainly distraction to be avoided. So though they are visible and audible, ignore them and ensure that they are able to ignore you. So no loud conversation to spouse on buying evening’s requirement (she would come late, so pick up children, and keep dhal ready etc.), mouthing childish and sweet words or threatening words to growing and troublesome kids (do Maths home work beta, is the Hindi homework over, didn’t I tell you to…), romance within or outside office.

The third striking aspect is the mobile phone with varying ring tones. I recall a senior executive well past retirement age having the ring tone of Dhoom going off when he was making a serious point at an important meeting. They can be quite annoying. When someone else has a ringtone identical to yours, then you could get irritated thinking how could he have the same ring tone. So what would result after few days of annoyance is more subdued ring tone and many executives walking up and down the corridor murmuring into the telephone looking serious and sometimes focused clearly on domestic issues ( mama, I told you it is not possible this week….., did the plumber come? has the maid come and cleaned baba’s school dress?)

The fourth would be learning new techniques on seeming busy on important assignments while doing nothing. But that perhaps would not be difficult to any Indian working person.

Now, I wonder who invented work station. The word “work station” seems to give an impression of a temporary halting place – like railway station- and not a place where we spent a large portion of our waking time. It sounds like a station for working and nothing more. Perhaps it is an American usage where most things are impersonal – even family relationships. Every child is expected to have a separate room. A parent cannot go into his grown up children’s room without permission. So places without privacy are perhaps temporary habitats by their standards.

So off tomorrow to the new working station. Let me see how all of us working there fare. My hunch is that some of my colleagues could complain and look back to the glorious past and identify the fault lines loudly.

Open Office – Part2

It is nearly a year since I wrote the last blog. During that time, I visited Bhutan. It is an out of the way place for Indian tourists. I enjoyed it. My wife told me recently that she now appreciated the stillness of some of the places we visited in Bhutan. If anyone is interested to know more, do write to me. I have kept a diary of this visit and good photos also. If you enjoy chill climate in summer, seeing deep valleys, winding roads, waterfalls etc. then this is the place. It is not that expensive also.

My grandson put in 11 more eventful months to his 9 months of existence. The growth in the first three years of existence is said to be more that what happens in thirty years of existence in the later part of human life. So he started walking, communicating, speaking few words and being utterly mischievous. He has a lovely smile, which I am sure will break the hearts of many maidens who are yet to be born. He gave us a new perspective to life and living.

The open office grew on me. I became comfortable listening to the daily menu communicated by my office neighbor to the cook. I came to know the calling tunes of most colleagues. The older the person, the more dashing is the caller tune. Older persons do not change caller tune. The younger generation love change and that includes caller tunes also.

Most telephone conversations are conducted in loud tones. Except when confidential calls come, then everyone is capable of whispering on phone. The difficulty arises in concentrating on reading lengthy documents when the atmosphere around resembles a railway station. Then I remember Hindu philosophy which expects us to concentrate irrespective what the outside world resembles.

Share market crashed in an unbelievable manner. Many of us saw lot of paper wealth being extinguished on a daily basis. There is a muted recovery now. None of us are confident this would sustain or reach the old heights. Still some rise in Sensex is comforting.

What are most disturbing are job losses. For the first time in my 33 years of working life, I am seeing middle and junior level officers and executives losing jobs due to economic down turn. Management graduates are not getting placements even when they belong to good or great Institutions. This has never happened in the past. The situation in non metros is said to be equally bad. Small and medium enterprises are having great difficulties in surviving. I am not sure what is the level of job losses or erosion, but it is bound to be significant.

I had a lingering suspicion about IT related jobs as I could not fathom how far an average IT engineer would travel in his career. As a person coming from administrative side of business, I felt they would plateau out fast. Today’s scenario seems to confirm my belief that an IT person needs to contribute significantly to business to progress beyond the Rs. 25/30 lacs hurdle. Am I right? I would love some feedback on this rather instinctive rather than informed view.

USA has lost its charm for many Indians. The risk of being unemployed in a foreign country is frightening. India at least offers some kind of security within the bosom of the family or its extended version. Any way we are used to misery, somehow we will pull on. Would a father consider giving a qualified girl based in India to an IT bridegroom based in USA today without some qualms? Hard to say.

Why did I absent myself from blogs? Well, the creative urge dried up. I could not dream of something to write. I started and then left it midway. Today I decided I will scrawl something. I will be encouraged if I get 3 comments or criticisms or feedback. Does a person write for own satisfaction or for someone else to read, appreciate/criticise? I think both.

So, what do you say?

Let me know your views on the same

Anjeneyan

Image Source:

Cubicle

Personal Trip Clicks

Do we notice the imperceptible changes taking place around us?  Mostly not; unless compelled to do so.

The most common culprit of almost imperceptible change is age. “Why do you wheeze when you climb stairs for just two floor?” My daughter asked me last week. I passed it off as a toll taken by age; though the reality is that this weakness is an old one and remained unnoticed.

Most resist the external symptoms of time and related wear & tear. A thumb rule is that the older a person is, the more time taken for formal dressing. So there is a calculated effort to impress- bright colors, branded shirts/pants, hair waved back carefully. Sometimes I wonder, whether the person is comfortable in the role being enacted (for the sake of family). Why not let go and be what you actually are? But then, do many of us know ourselves well to decide to be as and what we are?

God, with His sense of irony, has made human beings attach undue importance to parts of body which have limited utility. Hairs on the head is a classic example of a decorative object. It does not serve any great purpose (unlike hands or legs). But the impact a great hair style has on the subject and his/her viewer cannot be measured. So we find youngsters staring hard at mirror for long periods, patting their hair, men keeping tufts (meant originally only for certain purposes) like women, old men and women dyeing their imperfectly to evade the toll of time and all sorts of odd behavior if examined in the light of reason.

When I was a young boy (several decades back) only school boys and  domestic men servants (who washed clothes, vessels, cars etc.) wore half pants in Mumbai.  Now of course, it is a fashion statement to wear half pants and odd sized pants on all occasions (except job interview) and thereby attempt to belong to another age group. So, when I wear a shorts (called half pant in the past) to the gym, I have an uneasy feeling that someone would  call me to wash their car.

The real changes take place in our sub-conscious and then trickle down to external visibility.  This is noticed only if we meet the person after a reasonable gap. Mentally we slow down- that is reduce the pace at which we want to live hereafter. We see this around us but do not observe. We want less surprises- less changes – expected or unexpected. Life has to be same from yesterday to today. But God and the world around us have a gleeful pleasure in altering our well laid down plans.  So we find sedentary grandparents rushing off to USA/Gulf countries for a new career in babysitting (most probably no one sits, the baby runs around and we run after it continuously till our legs pain).

Did our parents sit back and ponder over their errors of omissions and commission? Did they even admit it to themselves? My son reminded me recently in non-judgmental manner of the instances when I beat him during his childhood. Did I beat him? Yes, I did. For what reasons?  I do not remember. Do I regret it now? Yes. But when I look at my daughter trying to tame my grandson (unsuccessfully at times) by oral requests and then resorting some small corporal punishments, I realize that these are inevitable and cannot be examined by hindsight.

Do we lose our ambitions, zest and enthusiasm with age? I would say they become more tempered. The  goal posts change. Survival up to the goal post  becomes more important than running past it. Some unexpected past time or interest catches serious attention.  So it could a social or a religious organization in which there is some lurking desire to play a more prominent role. I have seen several large institutions run  by persons most of whom had retired from gainful occupations long  back justifying to this logic.

But what is most important in all this is identifying what our heart really seeks- what is it that would give us great happiness. This is the most difficult part of life at any juncture. Long but aimless life serves little or no purpose. At each juncture of life, knowing what we want to achieve in our career, what we enjoy doing in our spare time, what relationships to invest in to make our life more beautiful is vital. This is more easily said than done.

I envy today’s youth some of whom are clear eyed to give up easy choices and seek for what they really want. India has given choices which did not exist some decades back.  But whether they are able to achieve a balance between their material success and mental happiness is a moot point. This perhaps applies to youth and younger generation in any point of time- yesterday , today or tomorrow.

So next time I visit the nearby shopping mall, I will take the plunge and buy the black shirt with stripes displayed at Zodiac shop. My family’s puritanical views on wearing such garments can take a back seat.

I will look handsome in that shirt- rather as handsome as I looked some decades back.

Anjeneyan.

2Sides of Life

My mother was a homemaker (to use a modern terminology). I do not recall a time in my childhood when Ireturned to an empty home and made my own snacks or lunch/dinner. I grew up taking for granted that mothers are always at home to receive their children. The outside reality slowly sunk in and I realized that women who went to work also were mothers whose children bid them good bye each morning and waited for them to come back to relate the days adventures.

I recall one blog written by a TV Newsreader which is particularly fascinating. This is two years old blog, but timeless in terms of contents and I am giving below a link to it.

Working Mothers: On IBN

The comments in response mostly from women are equally interesting. They are worth reading.

In today’s context when female education is emphasized and they are equal or should be equal to male in terms of opportunities and abilities , it is not fair or correct to tell a woman that her main job is to be a “homemaker” rather than fulfill her personal and professional aspirations. At the same time, children in the early and formative years require close attention from at least one of the parent. This need not be on a 24/7 basis, but ideally should cover a significant portion of the children’s waking hours and their time spent in the house. As the children grow up, the degree and span of attention could vary and reduce.

I am seeing in some cases grand parents being substitute parents. Some grand parents are frequent flyers to gulf and USA to care the grand children. I always wonder whether the parents bond well with children brought up by others? Do grand parents have the same energy they had as parents? Is’nt it a a bit tiresome for grandparents to do once more what they had done over three decades back? Would they not be looking thru the prism of values and mores which may not be relevant three decades later when the children become adults?

“Quality time” seems to cover the nature of attention needed, but at the same time indicates cliché or an overused word. I tried to imagine myself to be a parent with two children of varying ages between 5 and 10, tending to them after a full day at office and traveling for nearly 3 hours a day. Besides this there would be domestic chores to attend. How much energy would a person have – whether the parent is a mother or father- is hard to estimate? Would they tell stories from Ramayana or Mahabharata or read Tintin comics before the children go to sleep? How much of their day at school would interest them? I realized that I would do much less than what a working parent does today.

Perhaps the issue is not working vs non working mothers. The real issue could be how much of a bonding exists between the children and parents. I have seen fathers substituting for mothers who are sometimes more busy due to the nature of their jobs.

Children need and demand attention. Some times the attention they seek disturb others who see some distortion in relationship without identifying what could be the cause. Whenever I see such distortion, I wonder what would they grow up to be as adults. Do children of working parents demand more attention and carry some level of unfulfilled emotional needs? I don’t know. But I have certainly seen some children seeking more than needed attention.

The bottom line could be that when we bring another human being into this world, as parents we have a responsibility and duty to ensure that the child grows up to be a good human being and be able to contribute to the society in a positive manner. So when our children become adults, we should be perhaps be able meet this standard, at least in our own hearts.

Anjeneyan

Image Source: ANVClicks

Bringing up children: Part 1: The Journey Begins:
 

Bringing Up Children

Every union should produce results. Progeny is one of the results of marriage- at least an expected result. Every newly married couple face overt or covert questions about their “plans”. Any delay beyond 3 years causes great consternation to the families of the couple first and then finally to the couple. All this creates a psychological need to have a child or children.

The initial clarity during the mating period of waiting for few years, settling in respective careers, purchase of dwelling etc. may have been achieved or could be in process. But now the need for a child becomes supreme. The conception takes place. I have a vague impression that women do have hesitation or some apprehensions about the entire pregnancy and delivery process. Most males disregard these apprehensions and the emotional and psychological coercion is enough for the women to cross this hurdle. The child arrives. Respective in laws troop in with broad smiles and a realisation of being grand parents.

Those who become grand parents before reaching the age of 60, mentally tell themselves that “we are like students who pass CA or IIT Entrance in first attempt while others who still troop to school with their children or run around for admissions to colleges are slow starters. But we are young grandparents. Old age associated with the status of being grandparents is not applicable to us”. Mothers are conferred an almost divine status in India.

One story I heard in justification of this status is something like this. One young student questioned placing mother first in the statement “Mata, pita, guru, deivam.”

The guru who was smart delayed the reply. After a few days, the guru asked the student to take a brick, tie it around his waist and go to the well and fetch water several times. The well was obviously at some distance. After the student got exhausted, the guru informed the student that a pregnant mother carries the child similarly for nine months and hence they get this status.

A typical Indian story which justifies the age old statement. Western civilisation has not placed such exalted status on parents. Probably they are seen as the medium thru which the life is created on the earth and the medium is like a vessel we use for cooking. The food is more important than the vessel. The mother now gets to see the life which was floating around in her belly. She is initially wonder struck. Then the awareness sinks in about her primary responsibility. Feeding a child at 12.30 am or 4 am is not something any human being can get excited about for weeks and months. The excitement of working as an executive in an air conditioned office is more palpable than cleaning a baby who will learn sanitary habits after some years. She wonders “God, why does any one say all this is exciting?”. The situation of Indians who have emigrated to middle east or USA etc. is even more difficult. These countries have strict laws for child care. Some countries insist on full time attendant till one year of age (this is what I understand).

The role of father at this stage is crucial. Few have any prior experience. They are forced to learn by trial and error. Many families erroneously do not educate their sons to be aware of basic domestic chores. So they land up in family life without any knowledge of the drudgery involved in maintaining a house in a nuclear family. I believe that it is at this stage the next foundation of family life is laid. Couple who work together (whether both are employed or only one is employed) and share responsibilities build a stronger edifice of their marriage.

The children watch and instinctively understand how their family lives and adapt accordingly. If the responsibilities get shifted to outside family members like in-laws or servants, then the pattern changes. We see distorted behaviour from the children.  Excessive tantrums, need to seek attention of one or both the parents whenever they are present, inability to mix or be comfortable in a large group are some of the visible external symptoms. I cannot claim any memory of my two children’s early years. It all seems to be a blur now. When I watch my grandson grow, I feel a twinge of regret at not noticing and storing these memories at least in the brain. Cameras were expensive then and so there are few photos of those times.

Now Picasa contains a few hundred or thousand photos of various antics of my grand son. Most mothers would tell you that the first three years of the child are difficult but rewarding. Creation of life and its growth is still one of the greatest wonder in this world. The efforts we put in these early years yield visible results.

The exuberance of the child, its curiosity in exploring the world around it, lack of any fear or knowledge of danger gives the greatest pleasure. One of the memorable photos of my grandson (when he was less than a year) is his smile when he turns around to look at me before trying to pluck the AC plug from the socket. Today’s world does not give any educated person the time or privilege to think on such things.

Success brings its own material rewards and satisfaction. It requires great courage to step aside from such a path to enjoy such pleasures. Children demand lot of emotional attention. Our city life drains out our quota of Emotional Quotient leaving little for our family. This is where the distance with children/family starts building up.

Bringing up Children – Part 2: When do children grow up?

Perhaps when they start asking questions about the life we lead. Children consciously or unconsciously imitate parents in the early stages. At some point they question us- do we have to pray everyday? Do we have to write homework at 7.30 every day?

Cant’ we have the toy or something else his or her friend has? Slowly we have to set the boundaries within which we have to live. How does a parent explain that they cannot afford a particular expense as it is beyond them? I remember such a situation when my daughter asked for legitimate expense and I could not afford it at that time. I do not think I gave a correct answer. There is always a debate between quality time and quantity time devoted to children. In a traditional family, the father went to office to make a living and mother looked after the hearth. So father’s time was quality time. Children’s bondage with father was perhaps limited due to the then prevailing environment. This is evident from some of the movies we see of the 60s and 70s in any Indian language.

Today, with both parents employed in many cases, the distance or closeness could be the same. My belief is that children react well to a relationship where the parents are capable of receiving the confidences of their children. They should trust their parents sufficiently enough to exchange their innermost fears and receive emotional and physical support.

This is more easily said than done. This requires a long period of communication at a seemingly equal level without losing the basic authority as parents. Today’s parents do assist in homework, projects, exams and other burdens of today’s schooling process. Do they gain their children’s confidence in this process is a moot point. I saw one TV Debate program on parent’s involvement in their children post school education- Science or commerce, engineering or medicine and so on.

The program had parents and children on opposite sides of the debate. The vehemence of the children on the negative influence of parents on compelling choice of the education stream was quite an eye opener. The education expert – a college principal- said that we should trust over children with the choice they make and not second guess them. They generally know what they want and we should guide them only when they start expressing their doubts or seek help.

My wife has an interesting view on how teenagers and young adults fall in love. She says that when the children lack emotional support or live in an emotional vacuum in the house, they seek an alternative outside the house. This is how love develops. In many cases, this seems to be true. I have seen children whose parents live in a different era and perhaps are not able to relate to their children’s emotional demands. Parents live in an orthodox yesterday era- where passbooks are reconciled on monthly basis, eating out should be out sheer necessity, new dresses are purchased for birthday,  Deepavali and school re-opening.

Marriage anniversary means visit to the nearby temple and then going to office. For children, Mcdonald is a fashion statement to be made, Coffee Day is THE PLACE to be seen wearing a jeans and latest tops with members of opposite sex. Spending a few hundred rupees on such an outing is normal. Would we have spent the equivalent of Rs 450 for our birthday party (what is party by the way?) say 35 years or 25 years back? I am told this is quite normal today. Cafe Coffee Day is the place for a small birth day party- the Cappucino costs not less than Rs. 30 or Rs. 35 per cup.

It is in such environment that love blossoms. If not love, at least rebellion against the ESTABLISHMENT. Long hair, awful looking half pants or three quarter pants, odd upper garments, skin hugging dresses which give quite the opposite message of the person’s character ( an otherwise timid person may look like today’s starlet in some youth oriented movie).  Is falling in love wrong ? (QSQT with Aamir Khan and Juhi Chawla or Jane tu with Imran Khan to quote a more modern example).

No, love is a beautiful emotion without which life is not worth living. But falling in love at the age of 18 or 21 seems premature- especially in Indian context. Everything is a struggle here- unlike abroad. Choice of educational stream, admissions, quality of teaching, post graduate education, employment, choice of city or town or metro for employment, accommodation, transport- basic things in life which are taken for granted abroad, pose insurmountable problems for most young adults. Love seems to be a needless distraction in such an environment.

Take admission for engineering, Medicine or any other such professional courses as an example. Each State has got its own peculiarity. Every year there is some litigation to arrest or mar the admission process at the penultimate stage. There is some Government subsidy for such education, but there is something called private college also. In such an environment, the parent struggles to meet their children’s expectations, their own economic strength or lack of it and matching their children’s marks with that of the demands of the educational institution. In such a situation, when a parent hears about a love affair (of anyone else) then there is genuine astonishment on how does anyone get time or energy to get involved in such activities at such an young age.

Lastly, do children who have become full fledged adults (crossed the age of 25 in my belief) need or expect our influence or emotional help. I think yes. But this line is thin. We cannot aggressively intrude into their emotional territory (“don’t be pakao”), nor can we be in an indifferent stranger’s domain. We need to understand the turmoil going through their brain and heart and respond sensitively. We have ourselves passed thru this stage -perhaps without much parental support. So it is easier to assess their needs and probe gently –like a doctor examining an open or an internal wound. It is not easy as now they are a closed book written in a foreign language (or like prayers we recite in Sanskrit- we understand the meaning in a limited manner).

For eg. what do we tell a married son or daughter about the difficulties we face in a marriage? What do we tell about the screaming babies (see my earlier blog) and feeding them at 2 am in night and the support they can expect from their spouse? I often wonder about this. My feeling is that mothers are more forthright in these things and put the matter in a manner which would put their backs up. There would be grudging acceptance later.

I think it is a lifelong relationship. Children remain children for parents whatever be the age. When I used to come home late from office, my father, who was well into his 80s, would remain awake and pester my wife about when I would come. When I reached home, he would confirm that I have reached and then go to sleep. I could not then understand his anxiety. Today I understand it and want to tell him that I understand the deep love and affection that lay behind his non expressive demeanour. But for that I have to go to another world. Do you agree or disagree? Either way, do respond.

Image Courtesy: AnanthV

This article is written by a friend of mine and it speaks of an amazing and beautiful personal experience of her and she has asked me to share it with you all:  

The author  Karishma S, is from Mumbai. She is a poet, an Engineer and a software developer by profession….  

 ”Making the moments count by Karishma S“ 

Numbers have become such an integral part of our system today that to assure knowledge and know-how too people term “experience” as a factor today.  Thus, age is often used to count the number of years a person has lived, but I feel that is only a psychologically quantifying factor. The quality of the years is what actually matters.  

I am only 24 years old but I have come across and gone through certain experiences which have made me feel I have lived  one  entire lifetime in those moments .These were the factors which have made me  recognize the significance  of being, I have been gifted with.  

Of those many ups and downs, I recollected one of my visits to the epitome of true pure love and kindness. I had the opportunity to see Mother Teresa’s orphanage where there were small children all below the age of five.  Some of them were only a couple of months old and many just a couple of days old. They were there mostly because they were born to unwed mothers. 

Now they were all alone in the world without a glimpse of an idea of what this world means.  Of course they are looked after in an exceptionally good way. They are given the best of food and toys and all the other care required. But what is missing is the love, the tenderness and softness of the mother’s bosom which the child feels when the mother carries him, the basic feeling of security which a new born baby too would understand. 

They crave attention like any child does. As all these thoughts rushed like the gush of wind to me, I realized, I was only an observer to the scene. I will stand there, think for two minutes about what is missing from the life of these kids, feel sorry for them and go back home and resume my daily chores. It is these kids who will have to face the harsh reality after sometime. It is them who will have to answer the daunting questions of the world.  

They say what you never have you never miss. Maybe these children will never miss not having parents. Their earliest memories might be those of having plentiful brothers and sisters all about the same age as them. Loads and loads of fun playing on the swings, playing with lots of toys and living a life of unknown reality.  

It was then what hit me…. Isn’t everyone entitled to a particular kind of life?  I do believe in destiny and fate, but fail to understand what these little angels have done or not done to be in this moment at this time.

As I walked through the doors of the orphanage I heard a little angel about eight to 9 months old, call out to me from her crib with her arms wide open, telling me to carry her. But I was not allowed to carry her, as the Sisters at Mother Teresa’s have told me that they don’t let you go once you carry them. So no point in making them cry, obviously I understood this.

Anyways I couldn’t help myself from going up to her. I think she did understand that I am not going to carry her. By now she must have been used to this. But I did stand there and play a game of peek-a-boo with her. Said a couple of rhymes and heard her giggle and laughed with her. For those moments I felt time was not there, it never existed. It was just me and the kids there and loads of laughter.

I felt I had lived a very sweet part of my life in those few moments that I was there.  I had understood so many things about my own life and made a couple of silent promises to myself. That day when I walked out of that orphanage I felt grown-up.

I felt a stronger sense of urge, responsibility and reason to exist… to make a difference… to be there for someone when they need… and I hope… I am able to keep my promise and fill in any void of the destiny of fate! 

Thank You! 

Karishma S 

Her blog: http://karishmasinghal.blogspot.com/ 

Image source: www.stanford.edu